I need a mind-leash.

[kiaxet]

Because my mind wanders, especially when I'm doing mindless tasks and such.

And because of it, I've come to a few conclusions.

1) I need to study for science. Badly. I should really be doing that now, actually.

2) Baselitz, though he may be a great artist with great works and great messages, seriously needs some form of psychiatric help. [/Fine Arts paper]

3) I should try Box.com for uploads, since everything else seems to hate me at the moment.

4) I'm going to drop Template.

Yeeeeeeeah that's a relatively big one, I know.

I've just been thinking about it, and, well...it's fallen into the type of RP I can't keep up with and interest in. There are small episodic plots, as well as mun-instated plots, but I haven't seen hide nor hair of an actual overarching plot. I'm sure there is one, it's just...invisible. Or so good I can't even figure it out. Or something.

But really, looking at the recent plots...I haven't been excited about one since the very first plot, about the police going after the characters. That one involved orders from on high, and it hinted that there *was* something going on on the plot level. These latest ones can be fun, but...well...I don't know. I'm just finding it unbelievably difficult to get interested and involved.

That, and I just have a terrible time keeping up with real time RP. I had no idea it would move at that speed when I joined. It's one of the same problems I had with Econtra - it moves faster than I can keep up with and still have an outside life, and I just can't do that. I know I'm not really active in Template right now, and I feel bad about it, but I also know if I throw myself back into activity I'll feel pressured to keep up with everything, something I simply don't have the time or the time management skills for. It's not pressure from any players - for me, it's just something that comes with the situation and the very setup of the RP.

So, yeah. I'm trying and it just ain't working out. Sorry, all.

That's all for now. On to studying, paper writing, and then the Hard Rock Cafe! :Db

Comments

[nalina.livejournal.com]

orz =( Just.. major orz.

[kiaxet]

Tell me about it. :/

[nalina.livejournal.com]

You're like... the few on there who'd actually rp and plot with me and stuff... so... yeah =(

[kiaxet]

...I didn't think we'd actually done anything, except sling veiled IC insults which were actually pretty funny. She's still going to call him Coffin Boy, y'know. I do remember the plots, though.

And I thought Vassal and Scribblemaster did stuff with Laharl? :o

[nalina.livejournal.com]

Yeah we hadn't yet, but you would have if you hadn't been busy and I'd asked :<

If by that you mean talk to him? Yeah. Although vassal's distracted again, his latest entry has only had the master talking to him. lol orz but I haven't been in any kind of log since october.

[kiaxet]

Yes, but life happened in the interim, as it is wont to do. ;;; Go figure.

...I started a log for the Thanksgiving thing...and then I fell out of it...*is made of lose* I'm going to feel pretty bad about leaving you and Chrno-mun in the lurch, but I don't think there's much I can do there anymore. Plus, my roomie is sick to death of hearing me rant about how indecidive I am and how I can't get anything done in that RP.

Vassal is often busy IRL, isn't she? I dunno, that'll distract anybody. I, for one, am a prime example of that.

Sad!Flonne reappears! I FEEL SO GUILTY NOW ;;;;;;

[nalina.livejournal.com]

lol W-well you won't be running off every weekend to foreign countries soon... .... .... right?

Doesn't feel like you've really tried to do anything. :( It's really not as fast as Econtra was. It was pretty dead for awhile. Every time there's like...a handful of posts you think it's been going fast, but it really isn't.

Er... It's more though distracted in that her Doctor muse is uh stronger. Doctor>Flonne

[kiaxet]

Right. I think. Plans may very well change, I dunno. XD;

..................yeah, I know.

I know it's not quite as fast, but it still does feel that way to me. I think part of it's the fact that I was in Paixao so long and had gotten used to that speed and part of it is I'm just not comfortable having it move in real time. I just feel like I'm losing or wasting time when I'm not 110% active there, and I can't be 110% active, even with just one character. I just don't work that way.

It's tough to explain and probably doesn't make a whole lot of sense, but that's just how it happens over in my little corner of the nets. ;;;

Yeah, her Doctor muse is pretty strong...probably has a lot to do with his personality and even more to do with the Master's presence. Doctor + Master = O_o;;;

[makai-no-maou.livejournal.com]

Lol I'd think you too broke right now to do a quick weekend trip from california to Ireland ;D

:<

orz =( Cause you don't NEED to be that active. It's not like I'm posting every day. orz It just doesn't make sense to me, hon.

Why don't you least wait till new year to decide? and you're back in our timezones and stuff? :<

Yeah, I guess. ^.^;;; I know X____x;;;;;

[kiaxet]

YOU NEVER KNOW. :Db

*sigh*

...it's just the real time aspect that gets me. It really is. It's real time and no story and not fitting in, but mostly it's real time.

I've been hemming and hawing over this for the better part of two months. I don't want to be in limbo over one RP while trying to work with the startup of another. I've made my decision, and I think that's about all there is to it.

[makai-no-maou.livejournal.com]

It's not THAT realtime. >.>; And I'm sure Raina and Josie DO have plans.

Yeah, well, if we were in reverse roles, you'd be trying to get me not to leave too. :( orz Twice in one week... geez...

[kiaxet]

Days in the RP match up to days IRL? That's real time enough for me.

Oh, I'd be surprised if they didn't. Problem is, there's nothing going on in relation to those plans/the overarching plot. If there is, I can't see it. Either way, I lack the patience and interest in current plots to stick around in the chance that the plot will happen soon.

You're right, I would. This is the second RP I've left for these reasons, though - I think I'm just having problems finding a game I really like.

[nalina.livejournal.com]

OTL

More than anything I'm there for the people, not really the plot. orz I donno... I'm mostly just in this f***ing sucks to have two of my favorite rp buddies bail out on me in one week mode. Sorry =(

[atellix.livejournal.com]

Good luck with all your stuff! I'm in a better place now that my novel's finished and I don't have any more essays! ^_^ Just a couple of exams to study for and I'm good to go! :)

P.S. I can play the FFVII main theme on the piano. Took me forever to learn though, but it's one of my favorites!

[kiaxet]

Thanks! Man, end of next week this is all over...and then I go back to the States...everything is just moving too fast for me right now. :D;;;

Okay, NOW I'm jealous. This I want to see. Or hear. Or maybe both, if you can swing it. XD;

[astronomia]

No worries about it. It was fun to RP with you and Rosette will definitely be missed.

I can understand completely though. Lately (and by lately we're going by weeks here) I've pretty much only been RPing if someone asks me enough times to go do it. Just...kinda tired lately. I'd hiatus but I probably wouldn't really 'hiatus' so there's no point in it so I sit around dead and fail. I also fail as a mod, so, I can't blame you.

Still, I love Rosette ♥ We can still talk on AIM, ne?

You. Icon. Wow. XD

[kiaxet]

♥

Yeah, I think it's getting to be drag season for everybody. Semester finals, lovely as they are, sure don't help with that any (and probably cause most of it, come to think of it). :D;

Of course! ILU much ♥

Go to paixaorpg...or unreal_rpg...:3

[astronomia]

♥ I have much love for it.

Haha, actually, I dropped out of college this semester due to stress issues. And then I thought I would be better and...not really xD;; I'm trying, just...yeah. I need to try harder though.

♥ Okay, good.

I admit, Unreal looks really really fun but ldjkk I'm failing in two RPs, I dun wanna fail more D: If I manage to get back into playing with what I have, though, I'll look into it

[kiaxet]

I just got this image of them going EX-TER-MIN-ATE to the tune/rhythms of Carol of the Bells...you can't tell me it doesn't fit perfectly nevermind that Daleks couldn't carry a tune in a bucket. XD;

I had no idea. D: I think you need a week at a small tropical island with your own personal masseuse/butler. That should fix everything. X3

♥

Hey, no pressure. :3

[grazie.livejournal.com]

I wish I had been spoken to, but no matter, as you've made up your mind! Hopefully, one day, we'll RP together again.